Joe Biden Had a Very Good Night

Joe Biden Had a Very Good Night
Image: (via Getty)

Super Tuesday is…well, sort of over. And though the election will still be interminable, one thing is clear: Joe Biden had an extremely good night.

Thanks, in part, to eleventh-hour endorsements from Pete Buttigieg, Amy Klobuchar, and Beto O’Rourke, Biden far exceeded expectations, winning Alabama, Arkansas, North Carolina, Oklahoma, Tennessee, and Virginia, as well triggering major upsets in Massachusetts, Minnesota, and Texas (Maine is still too close to call, though Biden is slightly ahead in both). Biden gave a victory speech early on in the night, in which he promised to heal the country and also appeared to confuse his wife with his sister.

Bernie Sanders netted wins in Colorado, Utah, Vermont, and California, Super Tuesday’s “biggest prize.” But it was a disappointing night for progressives. Pundits initially predicted Super Tuesday was Bernie’s night to lose, and though the final delegate count wasn’t in as of 1 a.m., he didn’t do nearly as well as supporters hoped. Elizabeth Warren, meanwhile, got trounced. She came in third in her home state of Massachusetts and only took home 9 delegates overall. Barring some unexpected delegate-related meltdown at a contested convention (possible, but very unlikely) she has no chance of being the party’s nominee.

Also disappointing: Jessica Cisneros, who ran an impressive and exciting progressive campaign to unseat U.S. Representative (and right-leaning Democrat) Henry Cuellar, lost her primary. Cisneros was endorsed by Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez and polled well ahead of Super Tuesday, but Cuellar ultimately held onto his seat, winning at 52 percent vs. 48 percent.

Much less disappointing: Michael Bloomberg, who learned on Tuesday night that you can’t actually buy an election. Bloomberg and his team claimed they would win big on Super Tuesday and spent $215 million papering participating states in ads. He won…American Samoa. Congratulations to Bloomberg, who now has a total of eight delegates and a lifetime’s worth of abject humiliation!

It was, generally, a long and weird night. Voter lines, particularly in California and Texas, were out of control. Moderate Democratic voters, tired of endless infighting, were likely relieved to see the centrist wing of the party finally back the same candidate, but to progressives, the urgent last-minute push to play kingmaker with Joe Biden—yes, this guy, also this, and this! Wow!—was depressing as hell. Though after Bloomberg, a 77-year-old gaffe machine with a spotty political past seems far more palatable, though perhaps I’m just tired, too.

Anyway, the primary season is still ongoing. And ongoing, and ongoing, and ongoing, and ongoing, until we all probably get handed four to 27 more years of Trump in November.

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