Kanye West to Donald Trump: 'Time Is A Myth' and Other Shit That Made No Sense


Well, what the fuck.

Kanye West showed up at the Oval Office on Thursday afternoon for a chat with his favorite red-hat inventor, a man who also happens to be this country’s 45th president, proving without a shadow of a doubt that we are in the worst possible timeline.

Among the many topics discussed were bringing manufacturing jobs back, not necessarily to the States but to “the core,” Yeezy ideation centers, and Kanye’s belief that time is a myth. It’s a sad day when even Commander in Doofus is speechless.

But perhaps the most depressing—???—thing uttered in this meeting is how Trump’s “Make America Great Again” campaign appealed to West because… Trump’s a man? The hats remind him of firetrucks? His opponent was a woman? His dad and mom split up? He married into the Kardashians?

“This hat, it gives me power in a way,” West says over the sound I will never forget—ALL OF THOSE CAMERAS CLICKING AWAY AS THE EPICENTER OF OUR DEMOCRACY BURNS TO THE GROUND—and after some thought, adds “You know, my dad and my mom separated so I didn’t have a lot of male energy in my home and also, I’m married to a family that um, you know, not a lot of male energy going on. But it’s beautiful though!”

Why does everything always come down to men and their baggage… can you keep that shit at home… please… don’t bring it… into my life… the news… our presidential elections……… this insane shit… must end… but how?

Am I a part of resistance Twitter now? Is there a hashtag I should know about? Can someone get me like, half of a Klonopin?

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