Men's Health Is Ready To Seduce You, Ladies
LatestOh, Men’s Health. You are truly the gift that keeps on giving, and it seems as though each new seduction guide you deliver is crazier than the last.
Today’s entry into the Men’s Health WTF-A-Thon, “33 Simple Sex Tips To Turn Her On,” is yet another list of borderline psychotic advice designed to help men either charm or horrify women, depending on your point of view. Let’s take a look at some of these sexy sexy seductive tips, shall we?
Buy Her a Silk Thong
A gift of lingerie is cliched, right? So twist it. Give it to her when you (seemingly) don’t expect sex right then and there. Pass it under the table at a restaurant and ask her to go to the ladies’ room and change into it. “It’s a little naughty, but she has a chance to play back,” says Joy Davidson, Ph.D., a relationship therapist in Seattle. Not recommended for a first date.
Not recommended for a first date? How about not recommended for, I don’t know, ever? Where would this ever be sexy or appropriate? Doesn’t quite work at a fancy restaurant: “Thanks for coming to dinner with me tonight, Caryn. Here’s a pair of underwear. Go put them on in the bathroom while I discuss the wine selection with our sommelier.” And I’m pretty sure: “Hey, Caryn, go put this thong on before our Awesome Blossom arrives,” doesn’t work either. A gift of lingerie is cliched. But perhaps not as cliched as the guy who buys the gift and then immediately assumes that the woman has to put it on because he says so.
Embrace Her Until She Ends It
Good kissing tops most women’s lists of turn-ons, but don’t underestimate the heating power of a great hug, especially when she initiates it. “Let her know how much you savor it,” says Lou Paget, author of 365 Days of Sensational Sex. Make it clear you don’t want the hug to end.
Ah, yes. The dude who tries to turn a good-bye hug into a passionate moment. Here’s a lady tip: it doesn’t matter if you don’t want the hug to end. If she does, the hug is over, Grabby McGee. Back up and say goodnight.