Michael Cohen's Turtleneck Wants You To Vote Democrat 


Donald Trump’s former attorney Michael Cohen wants you to know that he’s doing “okay” after pleading guilty to eight felonies and implicating the president in an illegal hush money scheme. Also, he wants you to vote blue this November.

A CNN reporter caught Cohen walking in Manhattan, wearing his standard crime man outfit, and asked him about his recent change of party affiliation from Republican to Democrat. “I’ve been Democrat pretty much my whole entire life,” he replied. “I switched because of the request from the RNC. Couldn’t be the vice chair of the RNC and be a Democrat.”

CNN then asked Cohen to elaborate on a tweet he posted on October 14 in which he called the upcoming midterm elections “the most important vote in our lifetime.”

“Listen, here’s my recommendation,” he said. “Grab your family, grab your friends, grab your neighbors, and get to the poll, because if not, you are going to have another two or another six years of this craziness.”

It’s cute how he thinks this absolves him of all of his fuckery.

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