The Married By 30 TV Show: So Wrong


Ricky Van Veen, cofounder of, is looking for ladies (and gay men) to star in his new reality TV show, Married By 30. Oh yes, definitely, let’s celebrate the bloodsport of misguided singles everywhere: Putting a deadline on love!

Oh, it’s not love they want by 30? Just marriage? Interesting. Well, for the sake of argument, let’s say it’s love.

As I have written before, love is not an appointment you can make. You can’t force love into your life anymore than you can force the sun to shine. And isn’t falling in love about the surprise, the thrill, the caught-off-guard feeling? How can you be caught off-guard when you hyper-vigilantly keep checking your watch? Putting your emotional life on a schedule doesn’t leave any room for improvisation, happenstance, whimsy, self-discovery or fun. (It also doesn’t take the poor prospective groom’s wishes into consideration.)

Making your love life a priority is understandable, but thinking you can manipulate the universe and bend it to your will is basically the definition of insanity.

While the show is also open to guys, let’s face it: Women have enough pressure to get married. Parents, friends, aunts, uncles, Disney Princesses, and rom-coms will have you believe that the best day a woman can ever have is her wedding day. This show’s premise just perpetuates the myth that you are:
1. Always supposed to be “on the hunt” for a man
2. Not supposed to be dating anyone unless he is husband material
3. Past your expiration date and a spinster hag at 31

The worst part about the series is that it will glamorize the husband huntin’ women who are cast. Because if reality TV has taught us anything, it’s that the people who should be embarrassed about the way they act never are. Plus, the New Yorkers on the show — “smart, successful girls and guys with personality to spare” — are just the people who should not be on a deadline. They should be living it up and enjoying what life has to offer without some sort of fake clock ticking in the background.

But whatever, it’s cool, good luck to you ladies and dudes who audition. Nothing says “this one’s a keeper” like a person who shows up to a hot date with a camera crew.

“Married by 30” Casting NYC Girls [Get Excited]

Earlier: Putting A Deadline On Love: Bad Idea

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