The Purity Myth's Jessica Valenti Talks Virginity, Weddings & Miss California
LatestJessica Valenti’s newest book, The Purity Myth, was released last month. Unfortunately, it took us until this week to get around to giving it the attention it deserves.
In the new release, Valenti, the founder of Feministing.com and the author of three – yes, three – other books, tackles what she terms the “myth” of female purity and virginity. It’s a big topic, encompassing not only the aforementioned issues, but abortion rights, sexual assault, and raunch culture, so I felt a straight book review might not suffice. A Q&A – conducted via email this week and last – appears below.
Q: I was somewhat surprised to find that much of the book focused on “traditional” issues of concern to feminists and progressives – the epidemic of rape and victim-blaming, anti-feminist and anti-choice activism and policy, the “porn”/”raunch” culture and sexualization of young girls – in a book about the idea of female purity. In fact, I got the distinct sense that you broached these other issues as a way of introducing them to readers who might not be familiar with them or the ways in which contemporary feminist thinkers approach them; the book felt, at times, like a crash course in Feminism 101 (or should I say, Feminism 2009). I don’t mean to suggest that concern over female virginity and purity isn’t linked to these issues, but I wonder if, in your mind, a conversation about ideas of virginity/purity wasn’t a convenient, fresh way to introduce the broader concerns among feminists to people unfamiliar with them?
JESSICA: Well, the idea from the book really came about from my covering all of the “traditional” feminist issues on Feministing and finding this purity narrative come up again and again – and seeing the ways the issues were all linked. So yes, part of my political project is definitely to make feminism and feminist issues part of the mainstream conversation. But that wasn’t really the larger aim for The Purity Myth. I just don’t think you can talk about purity and virginity without looking at the very specific and distinct ways that they influence issues like violence against women, sexualization and reproductive justice. They are all related, unbelievably so, especially when you look at the ways that the conservative movement is using old school ideas about virginity to promote a really regressive agenda for women’s rights.
Q: What did you learn about notions and ideas of virginity/purity in cultures outside America, whether Western or not? Why did you choose not to include them? I’d love to hear what you had to leave out, for reasons of space or focus or both.
JESSICA: I would love to see a book exploring these issues in other countries or on a global level – but there are two reasons why I didn’t want to broaden the book outside of the U.S. The first being issues of focus and my area of expertise, which of course is U.S.-based; the second is that I think that the U.S. is at this really interesting and historical and cultural point where the over-sexualization of women in the media and pop culture is clashing (and sometimes intersecting) with the conservative movement in this peculiar way that is really specific to the U.S. I’m sure most countries have some form of virginity-fetishizing going on, but the U.S. sure does do it with a particular flair! Where else can you find purity balls and vaginal rejuvenations in the same small town?!
Q: I have to say that I was both amused and annoyed by your college roommate Jen’s assertion that sex isn’t sex unless you’ve had an orgasm. Although I agree that it is a “pleasure-based, non-heteronormative way of marking intimacy,” I also think it discounts the fact that the majority of women cannot orgasm easily from sex – penetrative or not. And I wonder if the embracing of the Virginity Movement on the part of young people – male and female – doesn’t stem in some part from an ignorance of women’s sexuality and the mechanics of female orgasm. Is it easier for some to call the whole thing off than to delve in to the intricacies, details and complexities of female sexuality? Is female sexuality scary to these “purists” in no small part because they do not understand it? And if so, do any of them betray any knowledge of this?
JESSICA: You know, someone else called me on this the other day and I think you’re totally right. So now it’s back to the drawing board on how to mark sex!
I also think that you’re right that a lot of the virginity movement stuff is mired in a real fear of female sexuality and ignorance of women’s sexual pleasure. I mean, a large part of their message is that women don’t enjoy sex as much as men and that’s why it’s important for us to be chaste! The only time it seems to be okay for women to enjoy sex is within the confines of a marriage, and even then you should be enjoying yourself because you’re doing God’s work and having babies, not because you might like the actual act.