John Boehner House Immigration Speech Summary: (Grown Man Shits Pants)


On Wednesday, House Speaker/Oompa Loompa with Marfan’s syndrome John Boehner delivered what I’m sure he thought was a scathing rebuttal to President Obama’s executive action on immigration. In reality, it was more of a pee-pants tantrum.

Boehner’s got his manties in a twist over Obama’s executive action on immigration, a move that, as Jezebel contributor Tina Vasquez pointed out, is not without its glaring flaws for people who actually have some skin in the game.

But this Congress is determined to spend all of the time they’re being paid to be in Washington flinging their poo in the general direction of the White House, and going hard in the paint against the President, who their voting base (which consists mainly of Precious Moments Jesus figurines, oil barrels wearing monocles, and angry, aging prostates) has decided is Bad. Voting base hungry. Feed voting base garbage.

Here’s just a small sliver of the trash Boehner mustered today:

We do not take this action lightly, but simply there is no alternative. This is not a dispute between the parties or even between the branches of our government. This executive overreach is an affront to the rule of law and to the Constitution itself. I appreciate all the efforts of those working to fix our broken immigration system, especially since I’m one of them. What we’re dealing with is a President who’s ignored the people, who’s ignored the Constitution and even his own past statements. in fact, on at least 22 occasions he said he did not have the authority to do what he has done.

Boehner then read a list of 22 statements the President made at various times that had tenuous application to his actions. The House is on the way to passing a bill that likely will not make it past the Senate, and if it does, will not make it past the White House. And a whole lot of nothing continues to get done.

As we ramp up to the 2016 double primary Presidential election clusterfuck, we’ll likely see a lot more of this.

Image via AP

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